Thursday, May 31, 2012

Gettin' a REAL Nigga... (by Ila Blu) #erotica #advice #freakyshit

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I can't give it all away but if you ask me I will always be true as I know it.....

For years women have been printing lists, manuals and recently full-length novels dedicated solely to helping other women get men. Women have been studying and practicing these lessons to many degrees of success as far as getting a man. Any man. These tips are specifically for ladies who like real niggas(R.N). If you don't know what a R.N is then these tips probably aren't for you. But if you know you like macks, playas and the occasional "pimpish" nigga here are a few commonly over looked suggestions for improving your game when dealing with the above average nigga.

First tip; Be cool.
You have to maintain some aloofness even when you are super attracted to a man. If he cant keep it cool i.e. he acts like its love at first sight re-evaluate if this is the "nigga" you want. A R.N. will always keep it cool that's why you want him. If he can't chances are there is some B.N. (bitch nigga) in him.


Don't ever ask a man who he is "dealing with" i.e. fucking. There are SO many rules and applications to this rule but I will keep it short and sweet here. Two reasons; first, you should assume under the rule of three that everybody is "dealing" with someone. You probably are "talking" to a few niggas yourself and if that's true, you never want to put you in a position to lie. A R.N. will sense this and immediately downgrade you to potential "jump-off". Don't ever ask a question you don't want to be asked back or set yourself up to tell lie.

If a man asks you a question don't ever hesitate to not answer. Sometimes we ask questions just to ask questions not because we really want to know the answers. So to break yourself of this habit break other people. Stop asking the questions you would not want to answer yourself. Most women spend so much time talking about themselves and why they are so wonderful you give the man enough time to see exactly what is not so great about you right off. You can' be a good listener because you talk too much. Basically you cant "peep" what's up with him because you are telling what's up with you. So *rule* don't talk so much. Spend time asking him questions to get to know him( not the forbidden questions). Real questions, then really listen. He eventually will tell you (or show you) everything you need to know.
Which brings me to the second tip; Be into HIM.

Although the first date or meeting is an opportunity to feel a person out, do just that. FEEL them out. Look him in the eyes. Watch his mannerisms. Check out his shoes, his watch and check out what he's noticing about you. Do give him a compliment if your moved to. Most importantly, listen. To him, not your internal dialogue.

Rule of engagement number three; Quit trying to "work with" every nigga.
Again ladies yes, we are responsible for the relationship we have with our man but that does not mean that every nigga that seems to be a good one but just has 'a few flaws' does not mean you have to be the one to work with him. Once you make up in your mind that you will work with a nigga your vibe changes to attract many of the niggas that need work. Men are hunters too they sense weakness just like we do so they tend to go for the chicks they don't have to be one hundred with. Make up in your mind a reasonable list of things you want a man to do or have the potential for and stick to it but allow for certain variables i.e. undeniable attraction(try to keep cool!). 

 

Now as women we claim to know allot of things but the one thing we need to know and except is often times the hardest lesson of all. Tip number four; KNOW when you're wrong.

Emphasis on the 'know' part. Now admitting when your wrong is a whole different lesson we will get into at a later time. Right now let's focus on the small of just knowing. Many women have false impressions of what a man would put up with or should take from a women usually due to poor advice or sad examples of women around them. Just put everything that sister so and so at church(who's never even seen a dick)told you and your auntie that can NEVER keep a man around (unless its after dark) right out of your head( will explain about listening to other bitches). There are many things that a real woman can and would never want to do to a R.N and there is certain shit that you do not want a R.N to have to do.

If you fuck up and pursue a line of questioning that you shouldn't be on i.e. who he fucking or was fucking and that man looks you real hard in the eye and tells you to a.) straight up drop that shit or (which is worse) b.) He looks at you right in the eye and asks you if you really want to go there? If he does either of these things and it gives you pause, ladies, take the pause to think. First of all do you really want to go there? I mean is YOUR shit straight. If you know you dont have any unexplained lapses in time or that you HAVE been on your job of sucking this man off atleast two to three times a week and you been letting him hit the ass at least once a month...then you may precede at your own risk.

But if know your shit is not right i.e. you been "talking" to other men, you have let someone else take you out, or you have been fucking some else, TRUST when he says drop it. Because you will be getting yourself into a catch 22 situation. If you know he has reason to suspect you, he does. Men are not women they are not going to run to you with every lil thing, they going to let it build up into something big like when you bring up some shit to him (that you shouldn't) he will then bust you with it. So if you now you are not right, let it go.

I know your not gonna want to do that. Hell, some of us do not know how to let shit go. Whatever you do don't get indignant. Why you might ask? Don't try to act all offended If he suggests that your shit is not clean and please, please, please, do not make the mistake of demanding an apology for him suggesting such a thing. You will be worse off which ever way you go because you have now put him the position to have to bust you on GP (general principal).

You really don't want him to apologize if you know your wrong because in the end you will loose respect for him. Anytime we get something we know we don't deserve we don't appreciate it and eventually will loathe the person who gave it so freely.****BITCH NIGGA ALERT****
A R.N will not apologize regardless of how indignant we act if he knows we don't deserve it. Only a B.N would apologize just for the sake of keeping the peace. A R.N knows when he tells you to drop that shit, you will KNOW to drop it.

Last and finally on the EXTREMELY short list of how you can instantly up your game; Suck more dick.

There are so many sub-lessons to this one I am really doing an injustice to you ladies only giving you the abbreviated version but here I go. There are are certain things you have to do sexually to keep a R.N, seriously ladies. First of all you need to suck his dick. Not once or twice but at least twice a week. I know allot of ladies are like I don't suck dick. Ok, but I bet your the same ladies that I hear constantly complain that your man cheats on you. If a man tells you he wants a woman that sucks his dick and lets him fuck her in the ass, that's what he wants. Now just because you tell him you don't do that and he STILL sees you does not mean he has learned to "deal with out it". It means he gets it somewhere else. Anything you won't do there is a skank bitch that will. So you don't have to suck any dick or give up the ass as long as you don't trip when he "cheats".

Ladies, you can not break a real nigga sexually. Why would you want to?! If he tells you there is something that he needs sexually and you tell him he can't get it he will. From someone else...

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Who's your Daddy? - Hubby ain't freaky no mo.

 

Daddy,

I'm a 23 and I have been married for nine months. My husband used to make me so hot by foreplay before we got married. We were so electric before, we really couldn't keep our hands off one another.

We used to make love everywhere using toys and role play, but now he is so boring!!! And it’s like he don't want to explore any more. Get my drift? Now it’s no foreplay to set the mood at all.  What can I do to get him back to pleasing me?

Signed Not so Hot

 

Not so Hot,

You’re languishing in what I like to call “The Halo Effect”.   Normally this dynamic occurs with white, Catholic men but surprisingly there are a number of black men in the Baptist and Pentecostal church who are afflicted with this issue.

“The Halo Effect”, is when a man who would have no problems being sexually adventuress with what a woman that he considers is a ho, refuses to seek out the same sexual urges with his wife.  He does this  because he puts a “Halo” on her and regards her reverently such that he can’t fathom having anything but STR8 missionary sex with her.

I have a friend who loves to get head and have anal sex.  But he…never…engages in those practices with his wife.  However, he has no problem getting side pieces that he considers a ho to satiate his urges.  I asked him on several occasions why he was cheating on a wife that would probably satisfy his needs and he lost his fucking mind yelling at me about how he could, “…never do that to his wife.”

And that’s the major problem with these types of men.  They still have the freaky urges that they do not engage in with their wives so they seek out a mistress or worse prostitutes.  To be frank, I’m surprised that you’re husband married you.

Don’t get me wrong, I think that you’re a wonderful, well-adjusted young woman.  However, these types of men typically marry virgins or women who are not that sexually experienced.  You must have really had his nose open for him to put a ring on your finger with his mind-set.  Unfortunately for you as soon as he did “The Halo Effect” kicked in his brain.

My advice to you is to get him in counseling…immediately.  You need a third party that will confront and break down the barrier in his mind that is keeping him from building a healthy and varied sexual relationship with his wife.

It’s going to take some work because he has a mind-set that took most of his life to build.  However, you need to deal with this issue before he cheats…or you.

 

Good Luck.

 

Who’s your Daddy?

 

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Sunday, May 27, 2012

Whose your Daddy? - Boyfriend Can't Get It Up #advice #sexadvice #erotica

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If you have a question for me send an email with Daddy or sum derivation there of to euftis_emery@yahoo.com.

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Daddy,

I am 22 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. Our sex life has went from 4 times a week to maybe once a month. We do not live together, but we try to see each other every weekend. He is always tired from work and never really has the energy to give me what I want. Lately my hormones have been raging! My question to you is what do I need to do to make my man become the jack rabbit he once was????

Signed,

Young & Horny

 

Young & Horny,

Your sexin’ has gone from four times a week to…maybe…once a month.  Say what?  Once a month!  Are you serious?  Been there…  Done that…  Never… Ever…  Again!

My dear you have a major problem and having been in a situation where my spouse withheld sex from me to at best twice a month I totally understand what you are going through. 

So your dude has gone from hittin’ it four times a week to…maybe…once a month.  The reasons that a man would change his ‘bonin’ frequency so drastically are as follows:

  • 1.       Onset of a medical issue (i.e., diabetes).
  • 2.       He no longer finds you sexually attractive (i.e., you’ve gained weight).
  • 3.       He’s bored with you sexually.
  • 4.       You’re a verbally abusive harpy and he is keeping you around because he is using your for financial or other reasons.
  • 5.       He’s got a freak or two on the side who is draining him of his precious bodily fluids on a daily basis.

I’m sorry my dear no man who likes to get his fuck on at least four times a week will go to a frequency of…maybe…once a month when he’s got willing pussy because he’s…tired…from work.  I don’t care how many hours a man works in a day, he is going to schedule some “pussy breaks” into his day/week somewhere.

So you’re task is to by process of elimination figure out which item(s) on my list are the cause for your problems.  The first thing that you should do is find out when was the last time that your man had a major physical.

If it’s been longer than a year, schedule one for him and be sure that he gets a full panel of blood work done including a testerone test.  If his physical comes back with flying colors then you need to be honest with yourself and determine if you are a verbally abusive harpy.

When your dude can’t get it up do you attempt to entice/seduce him?  Or do you verbally chastise him when his Jimmy doesn’t want to play with you?  Do you tell him that he is your King?  Your Daddy?  Or do you wear the pants in the house and you’re constantly on your dude telling him to man-up, stop being a panty-waste, or worse stop acting like a bitch?

If you’re a verbally abusive harpy (and you know if you are) then my advice to you is to leave dude alone and move on to the next one.  Because believe me you’re sleeping with the enemy and whatever reason that dude is keeping you around is definitely not in your best interest.

But if your problem is not medical and you’re not a mouthy harpy then here is a test that you can use on your man to eliminate the rest of the items on my list. 

First, talk to your man and find out what slinky outfits that…he…would like to see you in.  I emphasized “he” because normally a woman will buy lingerie that she likes and typically what…you…like is…not…what your man wants to see you in.

So find out what…he…likes and even if you feel his choices are slutty or stank…wear…it!  Next before buying your play outfits, take stock on your body and be sure that whatever you purchase that it covers your flaws while emphasizing your assets.

Adequately armed for seduction, then tell your man that on a night that he has off that you want to cater to him.  Go over to his place, put on your lil outfit and prance around cleaning his house, cooking him a nice hot meal, run him a hot bath, clean his kitchen, dry him off, lotion him up, feed him, then put him to bed.

Don’t…mention…sex.  Just tell him that you want to cater to him and be his eye candy.  At some point, during your prancing around he should take it.  However, if he is so tired that he doesn’t, then ask him if you can set the alarm to go off after he has gotten a few hours of sleep so that you can suck his dick.

Don’t mention fuckin’.  Just ask him if you can…suck…his…dick.  And when that alarm goes off…  Slide down there and get to work.  He should be rested, relaxed and ready for you. 

Now after 15-20 minutes of head he doesn’t wax that ass or worse can’t get hard…  He’s got another bitch.  And that bitch…  Is fucking the…shit…out of your man.  Move on.

But if he does wax that ass…  Then you have been boring him sexually and you need to step up your game and learn some new tricks to keep your man hard and ready for you.  Because keeping his dick hard is…your…job.  Not his.

Whose your Daddy?

 

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Saturday, May 5, 2012

Whose your Daddy?

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Daddy,

I'm a 22 year old virgin living in Los Angeles.  I've always wanted to wait until I fall in love to have sex with someone.  I've been very close two separate times but both times I found out that they were already in a relationship with children.

To say that I'm just horny is an understatement.  I don't want to compromise what I have been looking for, which is truly being in love and having someone love me back. On the other hand what I need I can't begin to put in words. I'm way past being sexually frustrated.

I need to figure out if these feelings are normal. The longer I wait the more I feel pressured to find that person to love, but the deeper my sexual feelings become as well.

Signed

Torn and confused

Torn and Confused,

Life is very simple.  It’s about making choices and accepting the impact of those choices without regret.  When people experience, doubt, confusion or fear from a choice that they have made with their lives it’s because they have not fully accepted the ramifications of their decision.

People straddle the fence with life decisions for various reasons (religion, job, parents, friends).  In other words, they alter their behavior because they are concerned about what someone else thinks.  When this occurs they become conflicted toggling from what they really want to conforming to society’s viewpoint.

You are at war with yourself right now because you cannot make some simple decisions.  You crave sex but you don’t want it until you find love.  Personally I feel that both are mutually exclusive but if you have made the choice for the two to go together for whatever reason then you need to fully embrace your decision.

You need to distance yourself from all things that tempt you to have sex without love.  You need to focus on making yourself the type of woman for the type of man that you want to love.  Do so, without...one...second of regret.

Now if you can’t do the above devoid of regret and confusion then you need to be honest with yourself and determine if that is what you really want.   Because if it isn’t, then you need to decouple your need for sex…with…love and find enjoyment in occasional sex…while…you look for love.

Do so…without guilt.

Whose your Daddy?